So Google finally decided where to go in mobile: The Open Handset Alliance and their phone OS "Android".
I don't know if "Android" has anything in common with Marvin the Paranoid Android from The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy but let's assume this would be the case. How would the "Android" phone behave?
- if you try to call 911 it won't let you because "The NSA, FBI, NCIS and the police already know where you are!"
- if you do not use for two hours it will get depressed and shut down
- if you do not thread it with respect (that is, stroke it every five minutes) it will call the suicide hot line and burn all SMD fuses it has
- if you try to view google.com it won't let you because it's paranoia does not accept cookies that are valid until 2038
- if it has a bad day (that is, every day) and you call your mistress, it will silently open a conference with your wife
- because it knows so much more than you, it will always change your homepage to be youporn
- the only number you can call if there is no SIM card in your phone is "42"